Curse

Opeth11 · Sep 30, 2006, 12:00 AM // 00:00

Dave Chapelle and Chris Rock get into a fight in this movie.

Sir Skullcrasher · Sep 30, 2006, 12:26 AM // 00:26

I want Triple H and The Rock in this movie too!

Cyan The Archer · Sep 30, 2006, 12:51 AM // 00:51

Jim Carrey would be hilarious really(his leg getting eaten by a Raptor, and doing the thing he did in Ace Ventura when he was hit by a spear

)

funnyman100 · Sep 30, 2006, 01:05 AM // 01:05

o ya that movie was hilarious! I loved the part when he made shadow puppets at the conferense in the begging of the movie like when he pretended to pick his nose.

Opeth11 · Sep 30, 2006, 07:46 AM // 07:46

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sir Skullcrasher

I want Triple H and The Rock in this movie too!

And HBK!

Seissor · Sep 30, 2006, 11:42 AM // 11:42

they need some Bunny vatos, to make the film succeed.

Opeth11 · Sep 30, 2006, 08:38 PM // 20:38

There will be bunnies, but they will get slaughtered by Godzilla.

funnyman100 · Oct 01, 2006, 02:18 PM // 14:18

godzilla... smart

Paul Mahdi · Oct 01, 2006, 02:29 PM // 14:29

Random scene:

*A dark alley*

Sam Neil: We have to get the dinosaurs out of this city...

*There's a sound coming off screen and Sam turns around slowly with one eye squinting. Turns out it was just a bum shifting under his cardboard box.*

Jeff Goldblum: *Talking really fast* Yeah, we have to get em out of here. How'd they get here? Maybe they used our own satelites against us...

*Pulls out laptop from Independence day and watches the timer count down to 0. It hits 0 and Jeff slowly moves his head up from the laptop to look straight into the camera*

Jeff: *Hushed whisper* Checkmate...

Laura Dern: I'm so glad they asked me back for JP 4. I was getting tired of being a mall santa...

A raptor flys out of nowhere and eats Laura Dern then leaves.

Jeff: That wasn't in the script....

funnyman100 · Oct 08, 2006, 06:18 PM // 18:18

nice i like it, can you come up with more?

Paul Mahdi · Oct 08, 2006, 10:12 PM // 22:12

Nope

...I guess I could try....

Seissor · Oct 09, 2006, 01:22 AM // 01:22

include Bunny vatos

Paul Mahdi · Oct 09, 2006, 01:56 AM // 01:56

Random Scene:

Laura Dern: What the hell is this character even doing in this movie? I was only in the first one because everyone likes to see old people explain things.

Sam Neil: You have to explain how dinosaurs got to our cities.

Laura Dern: Ummm… Lets see…A logical explanation…would be…that…Oh my God! What is that over there! *Points behind Sam Neil*

*Sam looks*

*Laura runs away*

Sam Neil: What? I don’t see anything…Oh, he’s gone…Wow, he runs pretty fast for someone who uses a cane…

Random scene:

*Bunnies attack a pack of dinosaurs. Oddly enough, the bunnies win*

Random scene:

*Jeff Goldblum is disarming a bomb for some reason…*

Jeff: This is very difficult. I sure hope no one annoying like, I don’t know, Chris Tucker, comes out of nowhere and yells something in his trademark annoying voice.

*Chris Tucker jumps infront of the camera and yells “DO YOU UNDERSTAND THE WORDS THAT ARE COMIN’ OUT MY MOUTH?!”

*The bomb explodes and for some reason only kills Chris Tucker despite the fact the Jeff was leaning over it.*
*Dinosaurs and humans dedicate a day of peace in occasion to this moment.*

Random scene:

*Trademark Jurrasic Park child runs around kicking T-Rexes in the nuts*

JP kid: I’m a child in a Jurrasic Park movie! I’m invincible!

*The kid then spits down a velociraptor’s throat and bitch slaps it*

JP kid: Wheeeeee!

Random Scene:

Jeff Goldblum: What’s going on?

Sam Neil: No time to explain but I’ll try anyway! We have to get to the dinosaur queen, kill her, and escape from Earth in my Ford Escape Hybrid

*Sam turns and looks directly into camera*

Sam: That’s right when it comes to driving away from certain death, I chose the Ford Escape Hybrid. Built Ford Tough.

Jeff: Wait, nothing you just said made since in anyway…

Sam: Dude, we’re in a Jurrasic Park movie. Nothing makes sense. Remember how that phone managed to be operational even after being completely digested by that Watchamacallit-aurus.

Jeff: I wasn’t in that one.

Sam: Lucky bastard

***

If I mispelled anything, just pretend I didn't...

Seissor · Oct 09, 2006, 02:47 AM // 02:47

Bunnies!!! ;p

I pwnd U · Oct 09, 2006, 02:52 AM // 02:52

lol wow paul... that is great! More we want more! Add some fire to the next ones!

Paul Mahdi · Oct 09, 2006, 02:58 AM // 02:58

I'll come up with more, but you have to give me more actors to make fun of. Sam Neil, Jeff Goldblum, and Laura Dern can only go so far...

Paul Mahdi · Oct 09, 2006, 03:40 AM // 03:40

Double postin' and feelin' fine!

Oh, BTW the movie poster is a fake. But the movie may not be. Laura Dern isn’t an old guy. She was in the first one. So for all the past script ideas I’ve posted just replace “Laura Dern” with “Old guy from the first one”

Random Scene:

Jeff Goldblum: Oh my God…If the dinosaur robots get inside the bunker and gets a hold of the nuclear weapons…It’ll be… Apocalypse, now!

Sam Neil: Wait, what?

Jeff: I said, if the dinosaur…robots…get…Jesus, who wrote this thing?

Sam: I dunno, let’s just tack on some tacky ending with dinosaurs flying off into the sunset along side a helicopter… *Sam laughs*

Jeff: …

Sam: Did you even watch the third JP?

Jeff: No

Sam: Lucky bastard

Random Scene:

Arnold Schwarzenegger (I hope that’s right): Ve moost gat joo tu eh safe plaace

Jeff: I’m sorry, what?

Arnold: Ve, moost, gat, joo, tu, eh, safe, plaace

Jeff: …One more time

Arnold: VE MOOST GAT JOO TU EH SAFE PLAACE. WARUM VERSTEHT JEMAND MICH NICHT? ICH WERDE SIE Jeff Goldblum VERDAMMEN! TOTEN SIE DIE JUDEN! *

Jeff: I took German in high school…

Arnold: Shit…

Random Scene:

That dude…You know? He played Chandler on Friends **: Could there BE any more dinosaurs chasing after us?

Random Scene:

*Black out with the words “5 weeks after the disaster in the city”*

*Van pulls up with “FEMA” written on it. Guy gets out*

FEMA guy: Hello? HELLO?!

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

*I used a German translator so if anyone actually knows German feel free to laugh at the crappy translator the internet offers.

** I know, it’s Mathew Perry. It’s funnier the way I have it.

I'm running out of ideas...

Sir Skullcrasher · Oct 09, 2006, 07:20 PM // 19:20

Hey paul.. put me and pwnd in the script too!

Sir Skullcrasher · Oct 09, 2006, 07:22 PM // 19:22

Quote:

Originally Posted by Paul Mahdi

I'll come up with more, but you have to give me more actors to make fun of. Sam Neil, Jeff Goldblum, and Laura Dern can only go so far...

More actors.. put in Tom Cruise, Dave Chapelle, Adam Sandler, Katie Holmes and hell the entire cast of Lord of the Rings!

Paul Mahdi · Oct 09, 2006, 08:06 PM // 20:06

This isn't as easy as it may look...

As the saying goes "Dieing is easy. Comedy is hard"

I'll try to come up with more but don't expect rofls or lmaos. In fact expect that I don't come up with anything. Then you might enjoy the mere fact that I posted something.

\/ lol, double post